


Basis of Sentimentality

by AAG2649



Category: The Avengers (2012), Thor (2011)
Genre: Complete, F/M
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2012-09-06
Updated: 2012-09-06
Packaged: 2017-11-13 16:20:08
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 7,964
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/505407
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/AAG2649/pseuds/AAG2649
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>An accidental meeting between Loki and Sigyn was just the beginning of their relationship. In his moments of doubt, Loki would confide in his childhood friend with his darkest secrets. "All I have ever known turned out to be a lie." The story of a misunderstood god and his struggle for identity.</p>
            </blockquote>





	Basis of Sentimentality

**Author's Note:**

> 1) Sigyn, in the Marvel and Norse mythology, was Loki's wife.  
> 2) This is my take on why Sigyn is not in the movies. With that being said, this story is set in the movie universe.  
> 3) Sigyn's physical appearance is taken from the Marvel universe.  
> 4) Enjoy this story!

 

  **Basis of Sentimentality**

* * *

The first time Loki met Sigyn, it was by accident. It was a warm day and after a few hours inside the library, Loki wanted to get some fresh air. Normally, he wouldn't have bothered, but seeing how he was constantly being watched by the stoic silent guards, he wanted a change of scenery, and a little bit of privacy. Although he was planning to enjoy the weather, he wasn't going to neglect his studies. Pulling a book off his shelf, he tucked it under his arm before he evaded the guards. As he walked toward the gardens with a satisfied grin on his face that reflected his sense of achievement for his mischievous act, the only thought running through his mind was his anticipation to read the very worn book. 

Approaching the open fields, the young prince found that he wasn't the only one in the garden. Sitting with her legs crossed, a dark haired girl was weaving a crown of flowers. Her small fingers were delicate, being careful to not bruise the petals. Each time the stems ran short, her cerulean eyes would seek out another flower and she would pluck it and began the process of intertwining the flower into a wreath again and again. Loki watched her for a few moments before announcing his presence.

"Do you have permission to be here?" His voice startled the girl and she quickly looked up. Her big eyes widen in shock, but she didn't move or speak. "Well?" He raised his brow in anticipation.

"I will leave if you find my presence a bother," she boldly told him with no intention of getting up. He walked closer to her, noting how her hair was dark like his own. The only major difference was the length.

"What are you doing here?"

She gave him a warm smile. "I'm admiring the garden."

"Well, your definition of 'admiring' is different from the traditional sense," he remarked dryly. The girl ignored his sarcastic comment.

"The flowers here are beautiful." Her slender fingers plucked another flower. "I wanted to bring some home with me." Loki gathered that she was not from here. Otherwise, she would have recognized him by now. Despite her naivety, Loki didn't want to attract the guard's attention, and he refrained from telling her his identity. After all, he wasn't supposed to be out here.

"You can thank my mother for that," he told her.

"I wish I could, but I was told to stay here." The girl returned to her activity, unbothered by his curious gaze.

"What is your name?" Loki finally asked.

"My name is Sigyn." She looked at the book in his hand. "Are you planning to read here in the garden?"

"Yes."

"Then I should leave-"

"No, stay here. I'll be over there," he pointed at the big tree nearby. "You shouldn't be wandering about the palace. You could get lost."

"Then I will try to not be a bother." She gave him a small smile and plucked another flower. The young Asgardian prince left her and settled down in the shade. He cracked open the book and began to read, glancing up every now and then to check on the girl. Unlike other girls, she did not speak or ask him unnecessary questions, and he was glad for it. Before long, a couple of hours have passed and he grew tired of reading. When he looked up, the girl was nowhere to be seen. Her disappearance didn't bother him until he went to bed that night. Not many people could sneak away from him without his knowledge. The art of evasive maneuver was his forte, and apparently, so was hers.

The other thing that bothered him was the fact that she didn't ask for his name. Normally, he would be annoyed that he would need an introduction given his status, but at least she left him alone so he could study. In the end, he decided that she was an odd girl and drifted off to sleep, dreaming of spells and magic. 

 

 +0+0+0+

Not long after their first encounter, Loki saw the girl again. This time, she wasn't weaving together a crown of flowers. Instead, she was braiding her hair. Her tiny hands moved with ease as she meticulously pulled her hair together. With her back turned to him, Sigyn didn't know he was standing there until he spoke.

"You have a habit of showing up unexpectedly. Are you doing it on purpose?" The girl halted her movements and withdrew her hands from her hair. Standing up, she turned around with her hand over her heart. He gave her a smirk, amused that he could easily startle her.

"I can assure you that I am not." Loki watched as the tresses untangled themselves as she approached him. "What are you reading this time?" He followed her gaze and held up his book.

"Incantations," he answered, ignoring the way her eyes lit up. "I need to memorize several spells for my training."

"Can you show me?" Sigyn exclaimed with interest. A flutter of emotion bubbled in his stomach, but ignored it.

"I suppose I could show you what I've learned," the prince told her, feeling rather boastful since no one else in the palace seem to hold magic in such a high regard.

Loki opened his book and murmured an incantation under his breath. With a wave of his hand, all the petals in the garden turned into a shade of indigo. They remained in that color for a minute before reverting back to their normal shade of pastels.

When Loki turned to the girl, he saw the look of awe on her face. "That is amazing!" Her hands clasped together as if she was trying to contain her state of excitement. "I wish I could learn magic."

He raised a brow. "What is stopping you?"

"My mother said that it's not proper," she said with an exasperated sigh. "I am not allowed to read about magic." Loki saw the disappointment on her face and then it was gone, replaced by a hopeful sense of wonder. Opening her mouth, she asked him, "Will you teach me?"

Loki crossed his arms. "Why should I?"

"We could practice the spells together," came her reply.

"I highly doubt that you would be able to master the basic skills."

"Are you saying that I can't learn magic because I'm a girl?" She inquired.

Loki rolled his eyes. "Even if I were to lend you my books to study, how would you understand them? Do you even know how to read?"

She held her chin up high before she spoke. "Of course I know how to read, I am a lady."

"Do you know who I am?" He paused for effect. "I am Prince Loki of Asgard."

Sigyn gave him a small smile. "Yes, I am aware."

"And yet you have not address me in a manner of respect," he said in a condescending tone.

"I beg pardon for my rudeness, Prince Loki." Her tone was neutral and a pang of dejection surged through him when he heard it. He knew she didn't deserve to be treated like she was beneath him despite the fact that she refused to address him properly. He was taught to be better than that, to treat everyone with respect. Fringing on pride and empathy, Loki decided to forgive the girl. He is a prince and he should act as such. Besides, she was interested in studying magic, which was an improvement from his brother's reaction, who laughed at him for favoring books over swords. Before she could bow her head, he waved his hand dismissively.

"Forget it," he told her with civility in his manner of speech. "I suppose I could teach you a few harmless tricks, but not today." Turning toward the woods, he walked away from her.

"Then I will look forward to our next meeting, Prince Loki."

"Yes," he replied over his shoulder. "Until next time."

As he drifted to sleep that night, his mind thought back to the encounter in the garden. Sigyn's face came to mind and he shook his head to get her image out of his head. There was something about her that was different besides the fact that she was a female. Her interest in magic delighted him. He found it amusing that she wanted to practice magic with him. Nevertheless, he knew that he was going to see her again. After all, he did agree to show her his skills as a sorcerer, and he was all too eager to show off.

 

+0+0+0+

"I thought I might find you here. Working on a new spell?" Loki looked up and saw Sigyn standing near the doorway of the library.

He couldn't help but give her a small smile as she walked toward him. "I suppose you can say that."

"I brought some food to share. Would you like some, Prince Loki?" Sighing, he took the tray from her and placed it down on the table.

"I have servants for that, you know," he told her, turning his gaze to his book. Absentmindedly, he plucked a grape and popped it into his mouth.

"Then why haven't you called them to bring you a meal? You have been studying too hard again." He could feel her azure eyes gazing upon his face. "You're very pale. When was the last time you went outside?" The Asgardian prince resisted the urge to roll his eyes.

"Why must you always question my health? You are not a healer," he stated with a hint of exasperation. Inwardly, he was not the slightest bit annoyed. After many years of being acquainted, it was hard to ignore that it was in Sigyn's nature to be caring. Her genuine sentimentality didn't bother him since he knew that she only had his best interests at heart.

"I don't have to be a healer to know that you are famish and in desperate need to go outside to get some air," she replied, slicing a wedge a cheese for herself. Following her lead, he took a slice of cheese and placed it on a piece of bread. His appetite returned seeing that there was food laid out for him.

"Very well. Let's go now if it would stop your incisive nagging." Loki snapped his book shut and gave in to her request. After spending hours coped up in the library, he was rather feeling claustrophobic now that Sigyn was here. As always, she was right. He needed to get some air.

Sigyn's lips formed a smile. "As you wish, Prince Loki."

As they walked down the halls of the palace, the guards greeted the Asgardian prince, who in turn, gave them a curt nod instead of replying verbally. Loki and Sigyn were walking in sync and he couldn't help but notice their difference in height. Although she didn't quite reach his shoulder, her delicate frame moved with ease as if she have walked down these halls a thousand times. Today, her hair was pulled back into a simple braid, revealing the sun-kissed skin of her neck and shoulders.

It had been many seasons since he last saw her, and he too had change. With his height, he easily towered over Sigyn, and although his hair remained the same, the sharp features on his face complimented his tall built. The only thing that was different about him was his choice of wardrobe, favoring the colors of gold and emerald, which contrasted his brother's choice of silver and red.

Turning the corner, Loki saw Thor sitting with Sif and the Warriors Three. They were all enjoying a large meal and listening to Thor as he blabbered on about forgotten treasures and lost maidens. Loki rolled his eyes as they guffawed loudly, attracting attention from the patrolling guards. His brother's story wasn't that amusing. Suddenly, a plan formed in his mind.

Turning to Sigyn, he asked her, "Do you want to see a trick?"

"Yes, of course!" Sigyn followed Loki's line of vision, stepping closely to hide behind a large pillar.

"Watch this," the prince said as he waved his hand. The next second, a nest of snakes emerged from the goblets, earning a yelp from everyone at the table. Sif and the Warriors Three stood up and withdrew their weapons as Loki saw rage radiating from his brother's face.

"LOKI!" Thor's voice echoed loudly. Not wanting to be caught, the young prince grabbed his companion's hand and headed down the hall.

"Run," he told her, pulling her toward an escape route. The thought of enjoying a laugh left his mind as he tried to navigate further away from Thor, who was giving chase.

"Will you face punishment for what you've done?" Her question earned her a scoff from Loki.

"That was just a bit of fun," he said with a smirk on his face. "My brother won't tell my father. He has too much pride."

The pair ran toward the woods, never stopping until they were sure that Thor wasn't chasing after them. "It was quite amusing," she agreed.

Finally, they were at the clearing. Once they were near the edge of the cliff overlooking the city, they both sat down to rest. After a few moments, Loki turned to her, "Sigyn."

She gave him her undivided attention. "Yes, Prince Loki?"

"You have my permission to address me by my first name. There is no need for formalities." Her brows furrowed in bewilderment.

"But you're a prince," she stated slowly as if he had forgotten about his heritage.

"And are you not a lady?" He retorted lightly.

She nodded her head. "I am."

"Then from now on, we can drop the formalities when we are not around other people."

Sigyn gave him a smile. "Does this mean we are friends?"

He paused for a moment before replying. "Yes, I suppose we are."

"Then I am glad we are friends, Loki." He turned his head away in attempt to stop a stupid grin from forming on his face, but it was in vain. Her smile was contagious.

"So am I," he told her as they looked over the city.

Two things came to his mind as they sat there in silence. One, he was glad that Sigyn had agreed to be his friend, and two, as much as he loved Thor, he realized that they were too different. With Sigyn, he could talk to her about spells and mystical artifacts they have researched. He enjoyed talking to her. She wasn't annoying, nor was she daft. She was different from the rest. For the first time in his life, Loki was overcome with feeling of delight that he could count on Sigyn to be his friend. It was a feeling that he could not explain, but he didn't care. What mattered was that she was here with him, not out of obligation or gain, but for him and him alone.

 

+0+0+0+

"You wouldn't believe the stunt Thor tried to pull today." Loki threw a dagger toward the target and it struck deep dead center. "He grows more arrogant by the day and his friends are another story." A few feet away, Sigyn watched as her friend channeled his frustration into something that was productive: target practice.

"I thought they are your friends as well," she wondered softly, wincing as the tree took its toll from Loki's anger. He had been at it for nearly an hour.

"They are more like acquaintances than friends," he answered with a slight edge to his tone. A few more daggers flew toward the tree, each with more force and accuracy.

"But you've known them for years now." Loki closed his eyes and tried to relax. The last thing he wanted was to scare Sigyn away, but he was in a foul mood and she was the only person who he can talk to without feeling like he was being judged. Finally done with his venting, the prince sat beside Sigyn and lay down on his back.

"And yet they always seem to favor Thor over me." The bitterness in his voice was still clear to Sigyn. Even with Loki's aid in many battles, Thor got all the glory despite his arrogance and impatience. It was hard to live in the shadow of your own brother, especially when everyone called him a hero and not giving credit where credit was due.

"Well, you can always count on me to be your friend," came her reply. She lay down beside him, being careful to give his personal space. They were both older now, no longer called a boy or girl, but a man and a woman. Their constant meetings in the garden have raised speculations among the royal grounds, but Loki brushed them aside. It was absurd. Sigyn is his friend and the fact that she happens to be a woman didn't concern him. It wasn't like they were spending every waking moment together. While he traveled to other realms, fighting wars and gathering knowledge, Sigyn remained bound to her own home, where she hones her craft of magic that now rivaled his own.

"I wish you would visit more often," he confessed, feeling better now that he was with her. All his doubts and worry seem to wash away whenever they were together. She reached over and placed her hand over his.

"I wish I could as well," Sigyn replied. "I always look forward to our visits." It had been many seasons since they've seen each other. As they grew older, they were burdened with more responsibility. Other times, Loki would visit her, practicing his transporting spells to either surprise or infuriate her, Sigyn couldn't tell, but she was always glad that he made time for her. Despite their lack of interaction, their interest in magic became the balm that held their friendship together as well as the occasional heart-to-heart conversations that were mainly about Loki's rivalry with his brother. Nudging the prince with her elbow, Sigyn got Loki's attention. "Do you have a new spell to show me?" She asked.

Loki sat up and gave her a smirk. "Yes, I do. Close your eyes." Obediently, Sigyn did as she was told. The socerer stood a few feet in front of her and whispered an incantation under his breath. When he was done, he called out to her, "Now open them."

Sigyn opened her eyes and found herself staring at multiple copies of Loki. They all stood still, scattered among the garden. Knowing that Loki would never reveal himself, she walked up to each one and touched the projections. Her hand went through the illusions as she tried to seek out the real Loki. After several attempts, she finally found him. Once her hand touched the solidity of his chest, the Asgardian prince made his clones disappear.

"Would you like me to show you?" He took her hand and gently raised it to his lips. Unaffected by his charm, Sigyn pulled her hand away and pushed him playfully.

"Please show me, O' Master of Magic," she said in jest. Loki gave her a mocking bow and began his lesson, his anger now gone.

They spend hours practicing and perfecting the illusions until they collasped in exhaustion. Drained of energy, Sigyn lay her head onto her friend's shoulder as they sat against a large tree. The Asgardian prince didn't mind, nor did he pull away.

Before long, Loki grew tired of sitting up and placed his head on Sigyn's lap. She shook his shoulder to tell him to get off, but he didn't move. Looking down, she saw that his eyes were closed and couldn't help but notice his dark circles. When was the last time he slept? With a sigh, she reluctantly let the slumbering prince lay in her lap, and had no choice but to stay still. After awhile, Sigyn was startled by Loki's voice.

"There will be a feast tonight. Are you going?" Loki had woken up from his short nap.

Sigyn looked down and saw Loki peering up at her. "Why do you ask?"

"I am only curious," he stated. "I have an obligation to attend, but the thought of going bores me to tears."

"You should attend," she told him. "You have the right to celebrate with them. Without your spell, they would have lost the Battle of Nornheim." Leave it to Sigyn to be his voice of reason. "Surely, they would inquire the reason for your absence."

Loki rolled his eyes. "I highly doubt it."

"Then how are going to spend your time away from the feast?"

"I could be doing a hundred things that would better amuse me," he grumbled stubbornly.

"Pray tell me, what are they?"

"Well, being here with you is one," the prince answered, staring directly into her eyes. His remark earned him a smile.

"Then we shall go to the feast together." Loki looked incredulously at Sigyn as she continued, "Like I've said, you have a right to celebrate with your brother and friends."

He let a small chuckle escape his lips. "You're the only friend worth celebrating with, Sigyn. You don't have to attend a boring feast on my account." His friend was so selfless; it made him feel even more fond of her.

"All the better to attend," she answered with a cheeky smile. "I've never been to a victory feast before."

"Then we shall attend." Loki got up to his feet and offered his hand toward her. They walked toward the direction of the palace in silence, prolonging the only time they have in solitude. Loki did not let go of Sigyn's hand and when she felt him squeeze tightly, her azure eyes met his warm gaze. "You are the only one I trust, Sigyn. Swear to me that you won't leave me." The sincerity in his voice was clear and she nodded her head.

"I swear, Loki." The prince leaned down and placed a kiss on her forehead. "I will be with you, always," she promised.

 

+0+0+0+

"Everyone is staring." They both entered the great hall where everyone was dressed in fine garments and drinking wine from golden goblets.

"Are you nervous?" The whole room was lit with the warmth of candlelight that hung in the center of the room, leaving the edges of the room in near darkness.

"A little." Thor immediately waved at Loki once he saw them. By the way he was holding his goblet Loki knew that his brother already had too much to drink.

The two of them walked in sync, ignoring the flicker of eyes as they made their way toward the large table. "I could ask them to stop, or make them stop."

"You don't have to resort to using magic on my account." Sigyn gave his arm a small squeeze, reassuring him that he should behave tonight. Reluctantly, he agreed for the sake of her presence. This was the first time she had ever been to a feast with him and he didn't want to ruin her experience.

"Perhaps they are captivated by your beauty," Loki remarked, earning a shy smile from Sigyn.

Before he could add anything further, Thor interrupted loudly, "Brother! Lady Sigyn, welcome!" Remembering her manners, Sigyn bowed her head.

"Prince Thor. Congratulations on the Battle of Nornheim. I heard it was quite a challenge."

"But we are victorious!" Thor clasped his hand on Loki's shoulder. "Nothing can stand the force of the sons of Odin and Sif and the Warriors Three."

"Yes, you are all very brave." Loki met her gaze, knowing that she meant to direct that comment at him. It was due to Loki's magic that gave them the advantage to win the battle.

Thor, on the other hand, had other priorities. "Come, have a drink!" At once, they were all served with goblets of wine. Loki and Sigyn sat down near the end of the table as Volstagg regale the audience (the drunk or whoever was listening) on his recap on the Battle of Nornheim. In Sigyn's company, Loki did not feel the need to move around the room to avoid talking to people. For the first time, the people left him alone. That was until Fandral approached their table, setting his eyes on Sigyn.

"Lady Sigyn, may I have this dance?" It didn't take Sigyn a second to gracefully deny the well-known womanizer.

"I am flattered, but I must decline." Fandral's gaze moved between Loki and Sigyn. The Asgardian prince didn't need to be a mind reader to know what the warrior was thinking. The gears in the blond man's head were turning, wondering if Loki was indeed courting his only female friend. Knowing that he didn't have a choice, Loki made up his mind to release Sigyn from his company. He had to put those rumors to rest.

"Go on, Sigyn. I don't mind." Unbeknownst to either of them, his fists were clenched tightly from under the table.

Her brows knitted together in bewilderment. "Are you sure?"

"I'll be waiting here," he replied, turning away as Fandral pulled her to her feet.

In his moment of contemplation, Loki didn't acknowledge his brother's presence until he spoke. "She is lovely, brother." Thor took a sip of wine and Loki did the same.

"Yes, I am aware." Her movements were quick and graceful, keeping up the rhythm of the music. In the years he had known her, Loki didn't know that she had learned how to dance. This was the first time he was witnessing her skills as a lady, and not her skills as a student of magic.

"You should ask her for the next dance."

"I don't dance." Sigyn's cerulean orbs looked back at him and he took another sip from his goblet.

"Then you won't mind when I ask Lady Sigyn for the next one?" Loki glared at Thor, giving him the most menacing look he could muster. The blond warrior gave him a smirk. "Careful, brother. You know what they say about jealousy." The master of magic scoffed.

"You've had too much to drink, Thor." Knowing that his brother had finished his sixth jug of wine. "You don't know what you are talking about."

"That may be true, but I am not the one who is sulking." Thor leaned in and whispered, "There is no harm in admitting your feelings, Loki."

He turned away, appalled that his brother's assumptions fell into the same rumors that he was trying to dismiss. "Thor, I don't have time for your little quips. I am not sulking. I'm merely concerned for her well-being."

"I'm insulted," his brother exclaimed. "Are you implying that I cannot dance?" Loki rolled his eyes.

"Tell me, when was the last time you dance without leaving your partner an injury?" Watching Thor trample over young maidens in his drunken stupor was not as fun as Loki had hoped. It was better. Once, Thor made a fool of himself and he collapsed on top of Sif, who in her own right, knocked him against the wall, leaving him battered and bruised in the morning. On that night, no one ever denied that Sif's strength could be as strong as Thor's.

"You will never let that go, would you?"

"Never," he replied with an amused grin on his face, earning him a playful shove from his older brother. In his process of holding his ground, Loki didn't hear that the music had stopped. Out of nowhere, a hand latched onto his. When he looked up, Sigyn was standing front of him.

"Loki! You must dance with me." Before he had a chance to decline her offer, Loki was pulled out of his seat. A couple of stumbles and awkward falls later, the Asgardian prince returned to his seat while Sigyn, on his insistence, went with Sif to get some fresh air. He, on the other hand, needed a drink. There was no amount of wine that could spare him the embarrassment of facing his brother.

"Well done, brother! You danced quite nicely for someone who claimed to hate the idea of dancing." Loki reached over to the jug of wine and poured it into his goblet, filling it to the brim. He needed to calm his nerves. After spending years attending feasts, it would be appalling to admit that it was due to his keen observations that he was able to keep up with Sigyn, but he'll never admit that to Thor. It was a miracle he didn't step on her feet, or worst, knock her over.

"I didn't have a choice." To say he didn't enjoy his dance with Sigyn was a lie. In the close proximity and the synchronized movements, he felt as if they were the only ones on the room. It was hard to deny that Sigyn had grown into a beautiful woman, and that she wanted to dance with him despite his lack of skill. She didn't laugh at him like he thought she would. Her words of encouragement were like a spell, urging him to continue even though he was at his wit's end.

"And yet you participated. Lady Sigyn is a force to be reckoned with." Thor threw an arm around his brother. "I see you have met your match." Thor was never going to let him hear the end of this. Thanks to Sigyn, he could no longer use the 'I can't dance' card to avoid interacting with other females, and his brother would make sure of it. Worst of all, Thor knew that he had feelings for Sigyn.

"Not another word, Thor." The stupid grin on Thor's face only grew wider and Loki threw him a nasty glare. Another gulp of wine and it went down his throat, forcing his thoughts to linger on anything but his realization that he wanted to dance with Sigyn again.

"Oh, I am never going to let this go." The idiotic grin remained on Thor's face and Loki crossed his arms, turning away from his brother. Ever the matchmaker, Thor beckoned for Sif and Sigyn to come over. Knowing his brother, Loki was sure that Thor was going to confirm the rumors of his desire to court Sigyn. Oh, why did Thor have to get involve in his love life? It was official, the master of magic was sulking.

* * *

She was gone in the spring.

Loki was rarely in Asgard and traveled often.

Summer came and he was immersed in the heat of war, fighting beside his brother and keeping intruders from invading Asgard.

Fall lingered and the flowers died slowly. Never once did he step into the gardens.

Winter came and went, but he barely noticed.

Before long, it was spring again.

She didn't come back.

* * *

"All I have ever known turned out to be a lie." Anger couldn't begin to describe what he was feeling. After all of the years of living in Asgard, growing up as the prince of Asgard, it turned out his life was nothing more than a fabrication created by the Allfather for his own political purposes. He was another stolen relic, a living remnant masquerading as a prince.

"What has happened?" Odin had fallen to a state of sleep after the confrontation in the vault. Confused and not knowing where to turn or who to trust, Loki went to see Sigyn.

In her presence, he felt a sense of normalcy. Loki sat down, feeling the hard surface of the tree on his back. The sky was dark, reflecting his foul mood and troubled plight. "You wouldn't believe me if I told you."

"Try me. You know I'll listen." He heard no judgment or pity from her, only concern for his state of distress.

"Odin isn't my father," Loki began. "He found me abandoned in a temple after the Battle of Jotunheim and brought me here to raise me as his own so that one day, I would serve to be his liaison for a political alliance with the Joutuns. No wonder he favored Thor all these years! I'm not his son. I'm the son of a monster." He stared at his hands, remembering the change in color when he touched the Casket of Ancient Winters. His skin turned into the same shade as that of Laufey's, a murky shade of powder blue that emerged over his flesh tone. The thought that the fallen ice king was his real father sicken him.

"You are a prince." Loki bit back a laugh.

"Odin raised me as a prince with no real intentions to groom me for the throne. He may have thought that keeping me in the dark about my heritage was for the best, but underneath it all, he never loved me." He was a false prince, an abandon prince, left out in the cold, and saved by the mercy of a sentimental conspirator.

"Of course he loves you."

"If he did, he would have told me the truth from the beginning," he said bitingly.

"Maybe Odin didn't want you to feel different or inferior." Loki didn't even dismiss that statement. Whatever lies Odin told himself to help him sleep at night did not concern him. He didn't need his pity or his protection. He certainly didn't need all the lies.

"There is no amount of rationalization that could make me forgive him. He is ashamed of me. I know he is." All he wanted was the truth and now it was clear to him that Odin never saw as an equal counterpart of Thor. Odin never considered him as an heir to his throne. He was nothing more than a bargaining chip. Loki closed his eyes and pinched the bridge of his nose. He was tired. Learning the truth about his origin had taken a toll on him.

"Then prove him wrong. You can achieve anything when you put your mind to it. It may seem hopeless now, but don't give up. You will find a way." He considered Sigyn's words, knowing that Thor's banishment had given him an opportunity to show Odin that he could be as worthy as Thor. The gears in his head turned as he came up with a plan.

"Thank you Sigyn, but I'm afraid I will have to go." Loki got up to his feet and placed a kiss on Sigyn. His cold lips touched her forehead, but she didn't shudder from the small contact.

"Then, I bid you farewell. Good night, Loki." He inclined his head and turned around, making his way toward the palace doors with a new purpose.

 

+0+0+0+

It was dawn when he saw her again. He stood on the edge of cliff where they used to spend their time as children, looking over the city below him. The light was hovering over the horizon, bringing warmth to the cool morning air. It was rather relaxing, different from the enveloping walls of the palace. Loki turned around and found Sigyn in the center of the garden and didn't hesitate to walk in her direction. He carried the scepter in his hand, smiling as he approached her.

"I see that you are enjoying yourself as King of Asgard." Loki pulled his helmet off his head and set it at his feet. He didn't feel the need to wear it. Besides, he didn't need to prove to Sigyn that the horns made him look taller than he appeared to be.

"The burden of the throne has fallen on me now. While Odin sleeps, we are on the brink of war thanks to the damage Thor had done. What am I suppose to do now?" Not many people were fond of the idea that he was King. He saw the look in Sif's eyes when he refused to lift Thor's banishment, but he didn't need to tell her that it was his mother's idea to make him king in Odin's absence. He had all the right to keep Thor away from Asgard.

"You can lead Asgard into victory and prove to Odin that you are worthy to be his son."

"Waging war against Joutunhiem is madness," he remarked with a slight edge in his voice. "Leave it to Thor to create a path of destruction in his wake. I always knew he was unfit to be king. I was right." He slammed down the staff to make a point that he was now the one with power, and it made him feel responsible.

"Loki, you forget that you are raised as a prince of Asgard, not a prisoner. You have as much right as Thor to inherit the throne. Once you win the war against Asgard, Odin will see that you are meant to be king."

His attention turned to the gold scepter and a memory flashed before him. "Odin once said that it's never wise to seek out war." Loki looked at Sigyn. "I can put an end to this needless war, and he will see that I am worthy to sit on the throne of Asgard."

"You will make him proud." A small smile appeared on his face.

"I will keep Asgard safe," he told her. "I will keep  _you_  safe."

"I have no doubt that you would succeed, Your Majesty." Loki took a step closer to her and a rush of melancholy overcame him when he spoke her name.

"Sigyn," he whispered softly. "I wish you could be here beside me. It is the only wish I cannot make a reality, even with my powers."

"You know don't belong in this realm, Loki." The truth stung him, but he refused to show his sorrow. With his new responsibilities as king, he couldn't find more time to see her and it made him feel guilty. She was always there for him, yet he couldn't find time to spend it with her. "I will come when you call me." Loki let out an exasperated sigh and remained rooted in his spot for a few more moments before a guard called for his attention. Though it irked him that he could not stay longer, Sigyn reminded him of his new responsibilities. "You must go now, My King." With a lingering gaze, he grabbed his helmet and turned his heel, knowing that she was right. She was always right.

* * *

He had failed. It was a bitterness he could not swallow. Thor had returned and ruined his plan to destroy Jotunhiem. His one chance to prove to Odin that he could be a worthy son was gone. After all he had done to ensure the safety of Asgard; this was how they would repay him. It was clear to him now. Odin didn't care what would happen to him. If he did, he would have followed him into the abyss. Instead, the Allfather hung onto Thor, his own son as he fell into the unknown.

Asgard was no longer his home. He did not belong there. He did not belong anywhere. As long as he stayed in Asgard, he will remain forever in Thor's shadow, and it made it easier for him to let go.

* * *

He had a new purpose now: to rule Earth. After being removed from the nine realms, he came to realize that with his newly found powers, he could rule Earth and become their king. The humans were always at war, slaughtering each other like droves while the gods of Asgard sat back and watched the suffering and chaos. Where are the gods when you need them? He could be the one to unite them all under one rule, and put an end to the meaningless power struggles and ruthless wars.

All he needed now was an army, and he knew where to get one.

 

+0+0+0+

The staff was heavy in his hand, but it wasn't something he couldn't get used to. The flow of power surged through him like an electric current, coiling under his fingers tips just waiting for his command. With a wave of his scepter, he was transported to his destination. The corners of his mouth lifted up when he saw her in the clearing.

"I expected you to visit me sooner, Loki." Sigyn looked as lovely as he remembered her to be.

Lifting up his hand, he reached out to touch her. "Did you miss me?" He couldn't help but use his new source of power to see Sigyn. Even though he was only a projection, he could still talk to her without Heimdall being aware of his presence.

"You know I do. Come here. Let me see you clearly." He must look different. His hair had grown longer, his body leaner. Aside from his hollow cheeks and sulked eyes, he looked well enough.

"I missed you, Sigyn." Loki placed a kiss on her forehead.

Attentively, he stood beside her, noting how the flowers were in a state of bloom. It had been a long time since he had seen these plants. "Why have you returned to Asgard?"

"The last place I want to be is in Asgard," he stated, firmly gripping his new source of power. "I am preparing a war against Earth. Once I take over their world, I will be their king." He was going to make the Earth his new home, where he could rule over the humans and bring about peace instead of sitting idly behind the sidelines.

"Yet, you are here with me." Loki gave her a smirk.

"Compared the company of the mindless drones, I rather be here with you." With a spell and he could easily control the mortals to carry out his bidding. A moment with Sigyn was far better than being around the humans, who often act like lost creatures without his authority. "Shall I tell about my grand plan?"

"You know it is not wise to share your secrets, Loki. Even with me."

He turned to her with a familiar look in his eyes. "You are the only one I trust, Sigyn."

"Then have faith in your plan. You would make a wise king." He didn't agree with her, nor did he say anything else as he let a moment of silence envelope them. His plan was brilliant and the humans were no match for his cunning mind. Before they can figure it out, it'd be too late.

Loki took a step back, taking in her appearance as the light over the horizon began to diminish. "I am afraid I must take my leave."

"Where are you off to?"

He gave her a smirk. "I must acquire an eyeball. Goodbye, Sigyn." The next second, he was gone.

 

+0+0+0+

"Humans are such fools. They are so easy to manipulate." He laughed out loud. "Let them believe that they have gained the upper hand, and they get arrogant. You should have seen the looks on their faces as they scrambled to avert the mad chaos."

"I take it that your plan reached succession." All was going according to plan. He had gotten rid of Thor, unleashed the monster, and now his army was going to pass through the portal and descend down onto the unsuspecting humans.

"It won't be long now," he said with a smirk on his face. "Once I sent the army through, Earth will be mine to rule." Loki placed his lips on Sigyn's forehead before taking a step back. "I must go now. The arrogant ironclad human has returned to his abode. I shall have a little fun with him."

"Be careful, he might try to appeal to your humanity." Loki allowed a chuckle to escape him.

"I'm a god," he stated firmly. "I am above humanity."

 

+0+0+0+

The manacles bound his hands together and a muzzle was placed over his mouth to silence his silver tongue. It was humiliating. He had come so close. Yet somehow, his efforts were worthless. All of his plans thwarted by his righteous  _brother_ , a lost beast, a pair of killers and liars, a soldier lost in time, and a narcissistic alcoholic. He had underestimated the humans; that was his one mistake.

After facing the Allfather and receiving judgment on his crimes on Earth, the contraption over his mouth was removed. His brother held a firm grip on his upper arm, escorting him to his destination. The sound of their feet echoed as they walked down the great hall.

Loki flexed his jaw, preparing to swallow his pride as he spoke up. "I want to ask you to do me one last favor." Thor turned to him, limping slightly from his battle injuries. "Could you deliver some flowers to Sigyn for me?" He inquired, ignoring the clatter of his iron chains. "I'm afraid I am in no condition to see her." Thor followed his brother's gaze as they continued down the hall.

Without questioning Loki, Thor gave his answer. "Of course I will."

It was his last request, his only request since he arrived in Asgard. Even as Odin was addressing his judgment, Loki did not say a word despite the fact that he was free to speak. There was no pleading for a lighter sentence, no disrespect for treating him like an animal, no argument whatsoever. Loki endured the long stares, the angry dispositions, and even now he managed a few words that held no room for bitterness. This was the Loki that Thor grew up with; the kind little brother who held a basis of sentimentality, and would swallow his pride to carry it out. It may not seem like it now, but there was no doubt in Thor's mind that there was hope for his brother's redemption. It may not be today, but someday in the future.

 

+0+0+0+

Thor went to see Sigyn shortly after. Walking out into the garden, he picked the flowers Loki had mentioned and carefully made his way toward her. "I've brought you flowers, Sigyn. They are from Loki." Thor gave her a huge smile. "He is sorry that he could not be here, now that he has return to Asgard." She gave him no reply, but it didn't bother him. "My brother has always been a talented liar, but I know in his heart he truly loved you." The God of Thunder lowered his hand to set the flowers down and took a step back. "I shall visit you again soon and next time, I will bring Loki along." He turned to leave. "Goodbye, Lady Sigyn." A gust of wind was his only answer and he walked away from the marble statue that stood in the center of the garden.

* * *

A few months after the Battle of Nornheim, Sigyn passed away. It was in the spring, and in the face of irony, Loki mourned for her death. His playful mood became dark and his company unbearable for some. He lashed out his anger by carrying out cruel tricks that earned him the wrath of many citizens of Asgard. While the people in Thor's company would speak ill of Loki, he would always be there to defend him. Even the God of Mischief couldn't fool himself into thinking that he could be cured of a broken heart.

Loki's only comfort was the garden. Many seasons after Sigyn's death, he constructed a marble statue in garden in her memory and would visit it often. Whenever he was in a foul mood, Loki would go to the garden to be alone, and after gathering his thoughts, he would return in a better mood.

In the end, everything was eventually taken from him: his freedom, his powers, his voice, but the memory of Sigyn would forever remain in Loki's heart. Always.

**Author's Note:**

> 1) Yes, this is how I wanted to end the story.
> 
> 2) Sigyn's death was implied in the interlude about spring. If you would look back, the conversations between Loki and Sigyn after that passage become one-sided. In reality, Loki was just talking to himself.
> 
> 3) Please give me feedback on my writing! Please and thank you!


End file.
